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Explore Quotations, Proverbs & Sayings

Welcome to the biggest collection of quotations, proverbs and sayings! If you are looking for a specific quotation, proverb or saying, check our universal database. We have collected over 150,000 inspirational quotations, funny quotations, movie quotations, famous proverbs and cute sayings that we would like to share with you. Find quotations, proverbs and sayings for any occasion and view them all for free.

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Letter "R" » Rodney Dangerfield Quotes
«It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: glass, kisses, lips, My Wife, The Dog, tough
«I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: cement, cementing, cements, neighborhood, neighborhoods
«One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: birth control, boy, one of the boys, one year, poster
«I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | About: Food, Sex | Keywords: in fact, put over, table, The Age
«What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: bone
«When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: doctor, slapped, slapping, slaps, slap on, The Doctor, ugly
«I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: bartender, bartenders, My Wife, plumbers, psychiatrist, psychiatrists
«I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | About: Fathers, Funny | Keywords: carries, my father, The Kid, wallet, wallets
«My mother never breast-fed me. She told me she liked me as a friend.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: breast-fed, breast, breast feeding, Fed, liked
«I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.»
Author: Rodney Dangerfield (Comedian) | Keywords: asleep, blind, blind man, fall asleep, fell, felled, felling, fells, I Woke Up, kid, library, one day, pimple, pimples, plenty, reading, The Library, woke
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