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Explore Quotations, Proverbs & Sayings

Welcome to the biggest collection of quotations, proverbs and sayings! If you are looking for a specific quotation, proverb or saying, check our universal database. We have collected over 150,000 inspirational quotations, funny quotations, movie quotations, famous proverbs and cute sayings that we would like to share with you. Find quotations, proverbs and sayings for any occasion and view them all for free.

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Letter "F" » Funny
«When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.»
Author: Clarence Darrow (Lawyer, Speaker, Writer) | About: Belief, Funny | Keywords: boy, President
«When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.»
Author: Emo Philips | About: Forgiveness, Funny | Keywords: asked, bicycle, Bicycles, every night, forgive, kid, Kid The, Lord's table, lorded, new, Night, one use, pray, realised, So I, stole, the LORD, used, used to
«When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.»
Author: Gracie Allen (Actress, Comedian) | About: Birth, Funny | Keywords: surprised, year
«We must laugh before we are happy, for fear we die before we laugh at all.»
Author: Jean de La Fontaine (Poet) | About: Funny
«Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.»
Author: Joe E. Lewis (Comedian, Singer) | About: Funny | Keywords: Scotch, thirsty
«When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.»
Author: Mae West (Actress) | About: Evil, Funny | Keywords: choosing, evils, tried
«When you invite the whole world to your party, inevitably someone pees in the beer.»
Author: Xeni Jardin (Columnist) | About: Beer, Funny, Party
«We must laugh at man to avoid crying for him.»
Author: Napoleon Bonaparte (Emperor, General, Politician) | About: Funny | Keywords: crying
«When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.»
Author: George Bernard Shaw (Critic, Essayist, Playwright) | About: Funny | Keywords: funnier, funny, hidden, Hidden Things, search
«What people call insincerity is simply a method by which we can multiply our personalities.»
Author: Oscar Wilde (Critic, Dramatist, Novelist, Poet) | About: Funny, Insincerity, Psychology, witty | Keywords: insincerity, method, multiplied by, multiplies, multiply, multiplying, personalities
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