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Explore Quotations, Proverbs & Sayings

Welcome to the biggest collection of quotations, proverbs and sayings! If you are looking for a specific quotation, proverb or saying, check our universal database. We have collected over 150,000 inspirational quotations, funny quotations, movie quotations, famous proverbs and cute sayings that we would like to share with you. Find quotations, proverbs and sayings for any occasion and view them all for free.

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Letter "F" » Funny
«Had I been present at the creation, I would have given some useful hints for the better ordering of the universe.»
Author: Alphonso X 'the Wise' | About: Advice, Creation, Funny, God, Universe | Keywords: hints, ordering, orderings, well-ordered
«Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and answer to, all of life's problems.»
Author: Matt Groening (Cartoonist) | About: Funny, The Simpsons | Keywords: alcohol, source, The Source
«Health Canada reports that the infection rate for chlamydia in Saskatoon is twice the national average, making it the chlamydia capital of Canada. Montreal has vowed to get their title back.»
Author: Rick Mercer | About: Funny
«Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?»
Author: George Carlin (Actor, Author, Comedian) | About: Driving, Funny, Humor | Keywords: driving, faster, Have You, idiot, maniac, maniacs, noticed, slower
«Good morning starshine, the Earth says hello!»
Author: Johnny Depp (Actor) | About: Funny, Greetings
«Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac»
Author: George Carlin (Actor, Author, Comedian) | About: Driving, Funny | Keywords: faster, go-slow, Have You, idiot, maniac, maniacs, noticed, slower
«Have you seen my Kung fu lately? Cause it has gotten totally awsome!»
Author: Gerard Way | About: Funny, Music, silly
«Golf is a good walk spoiled.»
Author: Mark Twain (Humorist, Lecturer, Writer) | About: Funny, Golf, Sports | Keywords: spoiled
«Grow like a weed»
Author: Proverb | About: Funny | Keywords: weed
«Golf is a wonderful exercise. You can stand on your feet for hours, watching somebody else putt.»
Author: Will Rogers | About: Funny, Golf | Keywords: putt, Somebody else
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